Your tits are I can't wait for
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
