No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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