Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize