Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
no. you can't hotbox the world.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
