Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
