Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize