Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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