i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
