If that was your dad, he is hot
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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