if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
