I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize