doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
