I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
tell your sister to shave her snatch
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
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