i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
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