Taylor Swift is so right about you.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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