and you said cock pushups were impossible
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
