U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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