ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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