He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize