At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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