I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
