fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize