im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I came so hard my ears popped.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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