You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
you have to choose: penises or morals?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
