dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
