I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
