I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Randomize
