i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize