Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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