tell your sister to shave her snatch
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
