I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
