you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
