help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize