would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
