so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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