There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
