That's intense
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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