Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?

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(315): View more from New York

I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"

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(937): View more from Ohio

Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.

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(479): View more from Arkansas

You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.

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(817): View more from Texas

Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.

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(812): View more from Indiana

I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar

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(716): View more from New York

you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..

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