did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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