I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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