Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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