no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
