You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize