I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
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