No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
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