so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
