Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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