You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Randomize
