I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
tell me about the eggs
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
