i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
The adults are the big ones right?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
