It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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